POSTED BY OMNIA ZAIED
It is the one time of the year where a museum becomes a destination and not a stop along the way. Wait, that was a Blair Waldorf quote. The good old days when B was cool and way less dramatic. Speaking of Blair, I have one word to say about her look and most of the looks at the Met Ball, WHAT?
Usually I don’t have much to say about fashion related events. It is true I am the Deputy Editor of a fashion magazine, but I am veiled which takes any credibility out of any fashion related comments I might make, so I just don’t. However when colleague Esraa Hegazy started showing me the pictures from the Met Ball I just had to say something, whether anybody is listening or not.
For some reason I felt I related to most of the looks. See when you’re veiled and you see a dress with long sleeves, there’s a natural attraction. And there were a lot of all sorts of sleeves this year. The first question that comes into mind at first glance though is why. Why? Why does Cameron Diaz look 80? Why didn’t Scarlett Johansson get her hair done? Why does Rihanna think she is a crocodile (with the nails and all)? Why does Florence Welch look like a peacock, a colourless peacock that is? Mary-Kate Olsen and Kirsten Dunst; Why? Why? WHY? Do they think they look good? Do they think people will think they look good? This needs some more contemplation.

Scarlett Johansson in Dolce & Gabbana

Rihanna in Tom Ford

Kirsten Dunst in Rodarte
It seems like there were two things all guests knew that no one else did. One, feathers are in, two it is the 60s; and since we are at a museum, let’s look dramatic. Mission accomplished.
It is true that Beyoncé runs the world, but it doesn’t mean she can wear a sheer dress a few weeks after she had the baby. Not even she can get away with that. And why the purple tail. She seems too excited to finally be out after having the baby, so she decided to wear a sheer black dress with purple feather tail, black dentelle and stones.

Beyoncé in Givenchy Haute Couture by Riccardo Tisci
And someone, anyone, needs to have a talk with Florence Welch and tell her to just go back to the studio, make good music and never, never come out in public looking like that. I mean we don’t just wear a dress because Sarah Burton designed it (especially when you see what Burton herself was wearing). We don’t wear these shoes and we definitely don’t wear this nail polish on our toes because they just look dirty. She looks like a chicken and the hair really didn’t help. No Florence, we don’t do this.

Florence Welch in Alexander McQueen

Florence Welch & Cate Blanchett in Alexander McQueen with Sarah Burton... The Three Witches
Now I love Sarah Jessica Parker, I grew up watching her in Sex and the City and learnt all the designer names I know from her. But Carrie wouldn’t do this. Though I like the pattern (kinda because it reminds me of the wallpaper I wanna buy for my bedroom) and the cut, but why is she wearing cuffs over her long sleeves?

Sarah Jessica Parker in Valentino
Another thing, how old is Cameron Diaz, really? I love her dress but with the makeup and hair it makes her look so pale and just dead. And Leighton Meester, eeib. That’s all I can say.We don’t die the hair to match the colour of the dress. Would B do that? I guess not. And someone please tell Mary-Kate Olsen she looks like Doby, the elf from Harry Potter.

Cameron Diaz in Stella McCartney

Leighton Meester in Marchesa

Mary-Kate Olsen in The Row
Bee Shaffer… that is Anna Wintour’s daughter, (of course I had no idea about this till her dress stopped me). Now I had a beach dress with the same pattern back in the days. I hated it. It just baffels me how the mother manages looks impeccable while the daughter looks like a sad old lady. She should have never let her out of the door dressed like that. The Devil rocked Prada while the daughter deserved to burn in hell. And congratulations Alexa Chung, you are the first to be able to make an original Marc Jacobs look like a dress from a wholesale store in Roxy. If only you had a Carina to match it with instead of the shirt! And OMG Dakota Fanning is no longer a little girl, it’s like she is going to her prom, prom dress went wrong though, fail.

Anna Wintour (The devil rocks Prada) & Bee Schaffer in Erdem

Alexa Chung in Marc Jacobs

Dakota Fanning in Louis Vuitton
I have no idea who Karolina Kurkova is, but I decided to love her. She rocks veiled and she is not even veiled. This totally my new look.

Karolina Kurkova in Rachel Zoe
And March Jacobs… I am speechless, really. Nice dress (or is that a see-through abbaya?) and nice boxers (here’s something I thought I’d never say. Ever). Did Alexa Chung steal his shirt? I understand he is too cool for me to fathom but I just can’t, all I could think of is how white his boxers are, they are too distracting from his already distracting outfit.

Marc Jacobs in Prada
But it wasn’t all so bad, here is a few of my favourite looks…

Camilla Belle in Ralph Lauren

Gwyneth Paltrow in Prada

Christina Ricci in a custom-made Thakoon

Ashley Greene in Donna Karan

Carey Mulligan in Prada - She looks like a disco ball but I love it!

Gisele Bundchen in Givenchy Haute Couture by Riccardo Tisci

Rooney Mara in Givenchy Haute Couture by Riccardo Tisci

Solange Knowles in Rachel Roy
And by far my favourite look of the night is… Nabila Ebid or Bianca Brandolini D’Adda who ever that is.

Bianca Brandolini D'Adda in Dolce & Gabbana